Saturday, June 9, 2007

Things That Make Me Angry

THE FOLLOWING ARE THINGS THAT MAKE ME ANGRY:

- Florida (the state in general): It means "land of flowers." It is HQ for thousands of old people - planning for world domination. Need I say more?

- Beavers: Why not?

- Otters: Childhood traumas...

- Non-Maneating Llamas: What's the point of having llamas that don't eat people? I mean really? What's the point?

- Cottage Cheese: What does cottage have to do with cheese?

- Sweden: What does Sweden have to do with anything?

- You: Why are you reading this? What are you, an alpaca?



So...

High Definition Is The Greatest Thing Since Jabba The Hut

I just moved and in the process a new tv came my way. It's HD so it's completely awesome. You can watch even the crappiest movie on HD and it still is awesome. For instance, I, along with my dad, thought "Pirates of the Caribbean 2" sucked. The other day I saw it on HD. I pissed my pants I thought it was so good (in a figure of speech). You can watch that piece of crap "Epic Movie" on HD and you'll think it is better than "the Godfather." Speaking of which, why is "the Godfather" all of the sudden being shown on Bravo?

So...

Saturday, June 2, 2007

The Impossible Quiz - Tougher Than The SAT's

The Impossible Quiz - the greatest feat of mankind. My friend told me about it and it is awesome. I choose to share this gift with the world. Behold, THE IMPOSSIBLE QUIZ!

So...

Aboot Me

I love ellipses... as you can tell... so that's what is about me... ya... ya know that Milton guy from Office Space... ya... he's cool...

So...

Just Lettin' Ya Know...

My birthday is comin' up, so... just getting it out there. I mean a comment or two isn't too much to ask for, right? July tenth (my b-day), I want to see a comment on every article here. Then I won't have a tantrum and burn down Google. Damn you Google for being so helpful yet so oblivious to my anniversary of my existence!

So...

That Kid From That Show...

Last night I was watching the Big Idea with Donny Deutsch and I saw a kid whose a total Bushy. He's ten or whatever years old and he says he wants to be prez in '32. Meanwhile he says that Bush is doing an amazing job with his... job...

He's a total piece of llama (whether I'm talking about Dubya or that kid... you decide). His name was Noah something... something Irish. So anyway, he wants to be prez by letting everyone know about him twenty-five years in advance. So basically it's a big publicity stunt. God he's gonna have a tough time in '32 when I beat him... yes folks, that's right. You're looking at, wait, no. You're reading the blog of the prez of the U.S. and A. (a phrase from my man, Borat). But don't get too excited. I'll mention you in my speech for being so helpful... whatever. Vote Llamee!

So...

The Birth of a Blog - What a Wonderful Thing

Congratulations, it's a blog! The gender has yet to be decided... the blog that is. I think it'll be like a boat or a country, so I'll name her... Marginalda. So let me start over.

Congratulations, it's a blog! And her name is Marginalda! Mazel Tov!

There, that's better. Meet Marginalda, planet Earth. You'll want to be getting to know her very well...

Anyway, my name is Llamee and this - unfortunately - is my life. Whazza! It's very nice to meet you. I have a mental picture of you in my mind. I wish I didn't though. It's kinda gross... wipe that thing off your cheek, it's disturbing me... there. That's a better mental picture.

So...